you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
