Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
