Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Randomize