so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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