I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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