I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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