It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
