4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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