I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
