She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
