She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
