So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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