I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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