Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Randomize
