just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
