Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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