So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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