idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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