her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
