I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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