i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
you never un-have a 4some
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
