I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
