I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Is it penis luge time yet?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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