Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
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