Having a random hookup so left but love u
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Randomize
