she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
