Everything about him screamed your future.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize