He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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