I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
