No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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