I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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