We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
