I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
