You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
