I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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