I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
