my shit smells like andre
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
