The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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