we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
