I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
