Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We don't watch enough power rangers
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
