what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
