dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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