The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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