I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
