We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
