so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
