i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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