on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
