Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize